As a gay couple, we were not sure if we were ever going to be able to have a child. While we were married and we wanted a family, it wasn’t clear to us how we would reach that goal. I had always thought that adoption was the only solution and only an answer for those who are in heterosexual relationships. I did not think that as a gay couple we would be able to adopt a child together. But as times have changed, we began to think about starting the family, and we started by looking into adoption. There is a lot that goes into it for sure, and it can take a very long time to end up accepted and with a child that is right for you. In the end, while we were about half way through the process, we learned about a different option that we ended up finding a lot more interesting. There are surrogate mothers who are willing to carry a baby to term for those who are not able to become or stay pregnant. For us though, surrogacy was only a part of the puzzle, because we also needed eggs. We discovered Surrogate Mothers Inc, which is labeled as an alternative to infertility. Through their organization, we were able to find not only a surrogate mother who would carry a baby to term for us, but also egg donors who were willing to donate eggs for us. The IVF doctor would then put sperm from each of us into the egg, so that the egg would be fertilized by at least one of us.
The fertilized egg is then implanted into the surrogate, and she will carry the baby to term for the couple. For us, it was exactly the solution that we wanted, though we didn’t even know about it in the beginning. We decided to move away from adoption and instead go the route of the egg donation and the surrogate mother. The process worked nearly seamlessly, and in the end we were there for our child’s birth and were able to take him home that very night. It was incredible to be a part of the pregnancy process, instead of just coming on the scene at the end. And after all those nine months, we had a new born baby that was our baby, to take home and create a family with. The process worked so well for us that we are moving towards doing it a second time. Not much would change about the process, we would just find another surrogate mother and another egg donor and then start the process again. We know now that we want at least two children, and if things go as well as they did the first time we may even try for three. The big family is a dream that we always had that we thought was unattainable, and in the end it turns out that it was reachable. Thanks in large part to our discovery of the surrogate organization.